1 /5 Info Account: If youre in the market for a law firm that goes above and beyond—in completely ignoring your instructions, handling confidential information with casual indifference, and treating unauthorized third parties like VIP clients—then look no further, Hage & Hage has mastered this art.
My time with this firm was truly unforgettable, though regrettably for all the wrong reasons. Confidentiality was treated more like a flexible suggestion rather than a professional obligation. Imagine my pleasant surprise when I discovered that detailed information about my sensitive legal matter had been graciously shared with an unauthorized third party—who had simply sent an unsolicited email. Even better, the firm didnt trouble themselves with trivial things like informing me about this correspondence or providing the basic courtesy of copying me. Adding a cherry on top, the firms representative directly contacted this third party via personal cell phone—quite an exclusive perk I was denied, despite being the actual paying client required to communicate exclusively through their office line.
Communication from this firm was nothing short of spectacularly inadequate. My own direct inquiries frequently went unanswered for days or even weeks, requiring relentless follow-ups to gain minimal acknowledgment. The firm consistently provided short, reluctant responses only after multiple requests. Interestingly enough, however, any unauthorized third-party contact seemed to warrant immediate attention, often receiving prompt, detailed replies within mere hours. Prospective clients might want to consider outsourcing their inquiries to random third parties, as direct client communication evidently ranks extremely low on this firms priority scale.
Billing was another delightful adventure. While invoices were indeed itemized, the firm adopted a rather innovative practice of not bothering to inform me when my retainer had been depleted. Instead, they surprised me with a thoughtful, unsolicited invoice via email—no prior notice required. Transparent financial communication? Clearly an unnecessary luxury in their esteemed business model. Moreover, the final bill was astronomical, especially considering the minimal activity and lack of tangible results achieved on my behalf. Adding to the confusion, the math on the invoice didn’t even add up correctly; for example, one invoice cited 7 hours at $300 per hour yet somehow totaled $2,310—unless basic arithmetic has recently changed, this discrepancy certainly speaks volumes about their attention to detail.
As a final touch, its worth noting that when I kindly offered a simple bottle of bourbon as a gesture of appreciation upon the successful completion of my case, I received an immediate and rather stern lecture about ethics and professional codes of conduct. Curiously, these unwavering ethical standards did not seem to extend to their handling of my confidential information or their communications with unauthorized third parties. Selective application of ethical rigor—another unique specialty of this esteemed firm.
In conclusion, if your ideal legal representation includes ignored instructions, confidentiality breaches, superior treatment of unauthorized third parties, delayed responses, unexpected financial surprises, and inexplicable billing discrepancies, congratulations—Hage & Hage is truly your dream firm. For everyone else, I recommend seeking legal assistance elsewhere to preserve your sanity, finances, and professional dignity.
